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Tuesday, 24 May 2016
I Caught Him Texting His Ex
This cannot be my life..Long…Help me
My husband has been texting with another woman. And I am embarrassed to say that this is not the first time. He had a text relationship with this very same woman over 5 years ago, a mere 30 days after we got married. It was graphic and sexual in nature. He used to date her before
me. He swore it was just texting and they hadn’t slept together since they broke up a year before we got together. I believed him. I forgave him. We moved out of that town and worked on rebuilding trust.
Things were good. We had regular couple ups and downs but no other affairs (and yes, to me this is an affair). Flash forward to February this year. He lost his job, I was 3 months post partum and really struggling. We were not doing well but we stayed strong, I thought, and held it together. Mid march, DH gets a new job. It doesn’t pay well at all but we are surviving, managing. This new job however, has him working form 1:30pm – 10pm. I work from 8am – 5pm. I am usually in bed by 9. I try to stay up occasionally but it is hard. He gets home at 10:30 and then if we talk until even 11 and the baby gets up to eat at 2 then is up for the day at 6, I am exhausted. April comes and he gets a weird phone call around 6pm on his day off. I see the name “Dina” pop up on the phone. He refuses to answer and looks terrified. She calls back, I tell him just to answer. He goes into a different room and answers. I know. I know what is happening. Dina is NOT the ex by the way. She’s new. He comes out of the room. I tell him to get out. He cries. Apologizes, says “nothing happened”. He was lonely, I’m a bitch, life is hard, blah blah blah. I forgive him.
We have a daughter. A beautiful baby girl that we begged God for. He said it wasn’t physical, we WERE having a hard time. Maybe I was a bitch. Maybe I have not been a good wife lately. So I forgave him and we worked towards our future. Present day – I got a raise last week. A good one. This raise will finally help us out of the financial hole we are in. Life is looking up! WRONG. I woke up at 5:30 this morning in a panic. I had this sinking feeling like I needed to check his phone. When I did, I found very graphic texts to another woman. The ex. He told her he was single. He told her he was dating. That he had been with a chick for a long time (me) but that I was a bitch and it didn’t work out. I woke him up and told him to leave. He acted like he had no idea what was going on. I showed him the texts. He said nothing. Not one word. The baby woke up. I had to get ready for work. I am dying inside. He is silent. I get ready for work. He is still sitting in bed. Silent. I get the baby ready…silence. He kisses her goodbye. I take LO to daycare. I am heartbroken. I get to work. Nothing. No texts no apology. Nothing. I am weak. I text him. He blames me. I am always tired, I am always on my phone, I don’t like his family, I am not fun, I am different, I’ve changed. He never apologizes. Says he is leaving.
I am dying. I have a baby. How is this happening. I am a mess. Help me navigate this shit storm that is my life.